Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Postcard From Armenia: Shopping Like A Local, And "shnorhakalutyun,

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Postcard From Armenia: Shopping Like A Local, And "shnorhakalutyun,

    POSTCARD FROM ARMENIA: SHOPPING LIKE A LOCAL, AND "SHNORHAKALUTYUN, FRANCE!"
    NAZIK ARMENAKYAN

    ArmeniaNow
    22.06.12 | 11:09

    By Sigrid Lupieri
    ArmeniaNow correspondent

    A man wearing khaki shorts and sunglasses was blocking my way. In the
    cramped space between the meat deli and the shelves of neatly stacked
    lavash, or soft paper-thin layers of fresh bread, my half-full shopping
    cart and I came to an abrupt halt. A woman next to the khaki-clad
    man was arguing with a harried-looking shop assistant.

    "We would like Diet Pepsi," she told the sales clerk in English.

    The assistant hesitated before picking out two bottles of an
    amber-colored liquid. He held them, arms outstretched, in an almost
    supplicant gesture.

    "No. No. No. Diet Pepsi," the woman insisted.

    I edged my cart around the couple. Tourists, I thought, shaking
    my head.

    Three weeks into my stay in Yerevan, I felt I was starting to blend
    in. I consumed copious amounts of cherries and apricots and heartily
    agreed with Armenians that their fresh and fragrant fruit is the best
    in the world. And I no longer checked the weather outside my window
    in the mornings-I already knew it was going to be sunny. And hot.

    But most of all, whenever the opportunity arose, I stood and gazed at
    Mount Ararat's ghostly presence looming over the horizon. An Armenian
    friend told me the snow-capped peak looked different every day. Though
    my natural cynicism led me to scoff at such sentimentality, I couldn't
    help but feel a twinge, one evening, as I watched the imposing mountain
    slowly transition into twilight shadows of faded blues and purples.

    After someone stopped me in the street and spoke Armenian to
    me-presumably asking for directions-I decided it was time to put my
    Armenian-ness to the test. If I could get through an entire grocery
    shopping expedition without appearing as a foreigner, I figured I
    could call myself reasonably well-adjusted. Shopping list in hand,
    I found myself at the Star Supermarket a block away from my apartment.

    I stepped out of the summer heat into the cool interior of the store
    and claimed one of the Lilliputian shopping carts-so tiny you have
    to bend over to reach the handlebar. I strode confidently toward the
    produce section and picked out several shiny, ripe tomatoes beneath
    the watchful eye of the shop assistant hovering but a few inches away.

    According to a colleague of mine, if you choose only the nicest fruit,
    you may be charged extra. Hesitant to challenge such an advantageous
    marketing strategy, I glanced at the salesperson and blindly scooped
    several generous handfuls of glossy, blood-red cherries into a bag.

    The shop assistant stared vacantly into space. So far so good,
    I thought.

    I headed over to the fridge and stocked up on Okroshka, a mixture of
    tart yogurt and cool cucumbers with a hint of fresh mint-perfect for
    a hot summer day. I turned to the three now familiar shapes of salty,
    tangy cheese: stick-form, string-form and tied-in-a-bow-form. It
    had taken my Italian-trained mind some time to figure out that the
    packages of slender strings of cheese, twisted like delicate birds'
    nests, were not vacuum packed pasta. Today I opted for bow-form. My
    cart was filling up.

    I sped past the minuscule deli, fearful of ordering three pounds of
    marinated chicken gizzards by mistake, and came to a standstill before
    the shelves of household items. A middle-aged woman stooped in front of
    the single row of detergents and took up the entire width of the aisle.

    I waited. "Excuse me" would have rapidly brought my undercover
    operation to an end. I racked my brains trying to remember the
    Armenian equivalent from my practical "Eastern Armenian Dictionary
    and Phrasebook". But all I came up with was a jumble of vowels and
    consonants which I was fairly certain didn't amount to anything
    intelligible.

    I shifted my weight. The woman continued examining the detergent
    options in front of her-all three of them. I cleared my throat.

    No reaction.

    I cleared my throat again, this time increasing the volume. The woman
    started and looked up at me. I smiled apologetically, a hand resting
    on my throat as if affected by a severe case of laryngitis.

    "Merci," I croaked as she stepped aside with a look of alarm. I
    thanked the French for their generous linguistic loan which allows me
    to say "thank you" without actually having to pronounce the Armenian
    tongue-twister shnorhakalutyun.

    I squeezed past the woman, managing not to capsize the precariously
    balanced bottles of unidentified cleaning products and dexterously
    navigated my way toward the cash register.

    The dark-haired woman at the register mumbled "Barev."

    "Hello," I translated mentally and regaled her with a mute smile.

    I stacked my items vertically onto the miniature conveyor belt. When
    I finished perching the last tomato at the very top of my produce
    pyramid-which I considered a stroke of architectural genius-the woman
    at the register looked up at me.

    "Blah, blah, blah, STAR," she mumbled. "Blah, blah, blah, CARD?"

    I took this to be "Do you have a Star loyalty card?" I shook my head
    and smiled some more. The woman hesitated and turned back to scanning
    the fruits and vegetables. The final total appeared on the screen. I
    placed a wad of cash onto the plastic tray above the register.

    This is going rather well, I thought as the woman handed me the change.

    "Mumble, mumble STAR," the woman said.

    I froze. Was that a question?

    The silence stretched between us as my mind scrambled for possible
    linguistic clues. And then it hit me. She must have said "Thank you
    for shopping at Star," I decided.

    I gave her my most dazzling smile. "Merci" I said as I collected my
    grocery bags. I quietly congratulated myself on my entirely successful
    shopping experience. Three weeks in Armenia and I was officially
    starting to feel at home.

    As I turned to leave, the woman at the register regarded me with a
    bemused smile.

    "You're welcome," she said in English.

    "Good-bye!" she called after me.

    I headed out the door and back into the scorching sunlight.

    Chicago-based journalist Sigrid Lupieri is spending her summer in
    Armenia and will periodically be sharing her impressions.

Working...
X